How sharing everyday challenges can help the whole family
Today I dropped my daughter off at Rock School Summer Camp – 5 days of thrashing guitars and bashing drums which for her is total heaven.
However, she was on her own and she was really, really nervous.
When we arrived it was total CHAOS. There were kids shouting and running around and many of the larger lads were playing a rather hairy game of dodge ball. Lots of nervous parents hanging about too, hoping their little ones hold it together as they sign their life away at the front desk. All standard for the first day of this type of thing.
When you think about it, it's actually quite daunting. We rock up, then pretty much drop and go and they’re stuck there for the duration without the freedom and reassurance of being able to hop in a car and do a runner.
But all this is essential stuff for their growth, resilience and adaptability. They’ve got to face challenges to learn that they can handle them.
Knowing this didn’t make it much easier walking back to the car though.
As I drove home I thought about how important it is to share our own grown-up challenges with our kids. Talking about how we feel when we’re starting something new or where we have to push through fear and self-doubt is the best way to teach by example. We’re modelling how living a full life means feeling the fear and doing it anyway. We’re demonstrating we all have to face our own version of dodge ball once in a while.
If we never share this stuff, or worse we hold back because we’re afraid of judgement, failure or whatever, we’re not modelling or doing what we’re encouraging them to do.
It’s a tough one because as an adult we have a choice. We can choose to play it safe and we can avoid things if we want to. But, that’s not going to lead to a fulfilling future for anyone.
So, stepping up and modelling feel the fear and do it anyway to our kids to help their development kind of helps us (the whole family) live a bit bolder.
Where will you feel the fear and do it anyway this week?